AMOR, CIÚME E POSSESSIVIDADE | Por Isaac Ioseph

Quando eu amo, naturalmente, esse amor garante ao outro liberdade. É o ciclo natural provocado pelo amor na sua verdadeira essência. Amor não é prisão, porque se assim for, provavelmente não existe amor além de palavras e alianças. A paixão pode aprisionar, o amor não.

Eu não posso acreditar em um amor que não me dá liberdade. Porém, preciso compreender que existe o ciúme, e ele é um desequilíbrio que nasce e age naturalmente toda vez que eu amo.

Amor e ciúmes são inseparáveis. Não existe amor sem ciúme. Se eu sofro o desconforto e o medo de perder o espaço e o aconchego conquistado, daí surge o ciúme. Porque eu não quero perder ou me desprender daquilo que eu tenho comigo e, como humano que sou, nunca quero perder aquilo que foi conquistado com grandes esforços.

Não existe problema em ter ciúme, mas eu preciso reconhecer isso, esse é um passo fundamental para o equilíbrio dos meus relacionamentos.

A partir de um vínculo estabelecido, eu preciso confiar, ainda que eu saiba que vínculos afetivos possam trazem insegurança.

Portanto, amor e ciúme são partes do mesmo combo, mas é preciso equilíbrio. Esse equilíbrio passa pela sinceridade de confessar a mim mesmo: “Eu tenho muito ciúme do outro, eu o amo muito, mas eu vou me equilibrar para que esse ciúme não se torne doentio, possessivo e nocivo ao nosso vínculo afetivo, minando a nossa capacidade de amar.”

O outro não é minha propriedade, ele tem vida além de mim, o que nos une é o vínculo do amor, não uma escritura. Certidão de casamento ou aliança não é escritura de propriedade.

Se existe ciúme demais, ao ponto de minar a liberdade do outro, os conceitos precisam de revisões, é preciso equilíbrio. Ciúme aprisiona, amor garante a liberdade. Quando existe equilíbrio entre ciúme e amor, o outro, embora seja livre, provavelmente nunca se afastará, porque na existência desse equilíbrio o ciúme não é nocivo à nossa capacidade de amar.

P.S.: Se existe insistência demais, talvez não seja amor. Vínculos afetivos só nascem através de processos naturais.

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