PERDOANDO O ABUSADOR | Por Joyce Meyer

Se o Filho vos libertar [torná-los homens livres], então vocês serão, real e inquestionavelmente, livres. JOÃO 8.36-15

PARA MUITAS PESSOAS, perdoar àqueles que abusaram delas é a parte mais difícil da cura emocional, podendo até mesmo ser um obstáculo que impede a cura. Aqueles que foram cruelmente feridos por outros sabem que é muito mais fácil dizer a palavra perdão do que praticá-la.

Tenho passando bastante tempo estudando e orando sobre esse problema, pedido a Deus por respostas práticas para o assunto. Oro para que aquilo que eu venha a lhe dizer a respeito disso seja uma nova abordagem para uma questão tão importante a tratar.

Primeiramente, deixe-me dizer que não é possível ter uma boa saúde emocional enquanto a amargura, o ressentimentos e a falta de perdão permanecerem abrigados. Agasalhar a falta de perdão é como beber veneno e querer que seu inimigo morra. A falta de perdão envenena aquele que a mantém, levando-o a tornar-se amargo. E é impossível ser amargo e sentir-se bem ao mesmo tempo!

Se você é uma vítima de abuso, tem uma escolha a fazer: permitir que cada problema ou ferida o torne pior ou melhor. A decisão é sua. Como pode uma ferida ou um problema torná-lo uma pessoa melhor? Deus não causa dores e feridas em você, mas, uma vez que elas lhe foram infligidas, Ele é capaz de levá-las a beneficiá-lo, se você confiar nEle para fazê-lo.

Deus pode transformar erros em milagres!

Satanás pretende destruí-lo, mas Deus pode tomar tudo o que Satanás envia contra você e transformá-lo para o seu bem. Você deve crer nisso ou, então, cairá em desespero. Como o salmista escreveu muito tempo atrás, “[o que, que seria de mim] se eu não cresse que eu veria a bondade do Senhor na terra dos viventes ! (Salmos 27.13).

Recentemente, recebi a carta de uma mulher que dizia: “Sei que Deus não causou seu abuso, mas, se você não tivesse sido abusada, não poderia me ajudar”. Ela continuou: “Por favor, não se sinta tão mal a respeito disso, porque Deus está usando o seu sofrimento para libertar outras pessoas”.

Muitos anos atrás, tive de fazer uma escolha: eu poderia escolher permanecer amarga, cheia de ódio e autopiedade, ressentida com as pessoas que me feriram e com aquelas que podiam desfrutar uma vida normal e agradável, aquelas que nunca foram feridas como eu; ou escolher seguir o caminho de Deus, permitindo que Ele me tornasse uma pessoa melhor por causa daquilo que enfrentara. Agradeço a Deus por ter-me dado a graça para escolher seu caminho em vez de escolher o caminho de Satanás.

O caminho de Deus é o perdão. Lembro-me de que, a principio, comecei a tentar caminhar com Deus. Uma noite percebi que não poderia ser cheia de amor e ódio ao mesmo tempo. Assim, pedi ao Senhor que removesse o ódio que esteve por tanto tempo dentro mim.

Era como se Ele tivesse entrado dentro de mim e arrancado aquilo. Após a experiência, nunca mais odiei meu pai, mas ainda sentia rancor, aversão e desconforto quando estava próxima dele. Eu queria ficar livre de todos os sentimentos ruins e más atitudes dentro de mim, mas “como fazer” era uma grande questão para mim. A medida que continuei a estudar e a meditar na Palavra de Deus e relacionar-me com o Espírito Santo, o Senhor me ensinou muitas coisas. Eu gostaria de compartilhar com você o que aprendi nos anos do meu progresso rumo à cura completa.

PASSOS PARA A CURA EMOCIONAL

Primeiramente, você deve escolher o caminho de Deus, que é o caminho do perdão. Ele não o forçará a isso. Se você quiser levar uma vida vitoriosa e desfrutar plena saúde emocional, deve acreditar que o caminho de Deus é o melhor. Mesmo se você não compreendê-lo, escolha segui-lo. Funciona.

Em seguida, aprenda sobre a graça de Deus. A graça é o poder do Espírito Santo que vem para nos ajudar a realizar a vontade de Deus. Tiago disse a respeito de Deus:

Mas Ele nos dá mais e mais graça (poder do Espírito Santo para vencer essa tendência má e todas as outras plenamente). Eis por que Ele diz: Deus se coloca contra o orgulhoso e altivo, mas dá graça [continuamente] para o humilde (aquele que se humilha o suficiente para recebê-la) (Tiago 4.6).

Você pode escolher perdoar e, contudo, ainda ter de lutar contra a frustração porque você é tentado a perdoar por sua própria força, quando, realmente, precisa da força do Senhor. O profeta Zacarias nos diz que “não por força nem por poder, mas pelo meu Espírito, diz o Senhor dos Exércitos” (Zacarias 4.6-ARA).

Não é necessário que você enfrente face a face seus abusadores para receber o beneficio de perdoar-lhes em seu coração. De fato, mesmo se aqueles que abusaram de você não vivem mais, você ainda pode desfrutar grande libertação se você decidir perdoar-lhes.

Após escolher perdoar e perceber que você não pode perdoar sem a ajuda de Deus, ore e libere cada pessoa que o feriu. Repita esta oração em voz alta: Eu perdôo a______________(nome) por______________ (seja o que for que ele fez contra você). Decido caminhar em Seus caminhos, Senhor. Eu amo o Senhor e transfiro-Lhe essa situação. Lanço meus cuidados ao Senhor, por isso creio na minha total restauração. Ajude-me, Senhor; sare-me de todas as feridas infligidas a mim.

Há muitos versículos que nos dizem que Deus defenderá o seu povo (veja Isaías 54.17). Deus é aquele que nos retribui, Ele é a nossa recompensa (veja Isaías 35.4). Ele é um Deus de justiça, a qual somente Ele pode trazer. Somente Deus pode reparar você pelo dano sofrido e somente Ele está qualificado para lidar com seus inimigos humanos.

A Bíblia encoraja os crentes a viverem em paz com todos, confiando no Senhor para cuidar deles:

Não vos vingueis a vós mesmos, amados, mas dai lugar à ira; porque está escrito: A mim me pertence a vingança; Eu é que retribuirei, diz o Senhor (Romanos 12.19-ARA).

Pois nós conhecemos Aquele que disse, A Vingança é Minha [a retribuição e o comprimento de toda a justiça pertence a mim]; Eu retribuirei [Eu exigirei a compensação], diz o Senhor. E novamente, o Senhor julgará, determinará, resolverá e decidirá a causa e as causas de seu povo.

É algo amedrontador (formidável e terrível) incorrer nas divinas penalidades e ser lançado nas mãos do Deus vivo! (Hebreus 10.30-31).

Uma das principais verdades que o Senhor falou comigo quando eu estava lidando com a questão do perdão foi: “Pessoas feridas ferem pessoas”!

A maioria dos abusadores também sofreu abuso, de uma forma ou de outra. Freqüentemente, aqueles que cresceram em lares desestruturados criarão uma atmosfera desestruturada em seus próprios lares.

Quando observei minha própria vida, pude ver esse padrão. Eu tinha crescido num lar desestruturado, e assim estava criando uma atmosfera desestruturada em meu próprio lar. Eu não conhecia outra forma de me comportar. Essa percepção trouxe-me grande ajuda.

Trecho retirado do livro “Beleza em vez de cinzas” escrito por Joyce Meyer

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